Sean Carpenter's 45-minute daily routine: five handwritten notes, the hot sheet, real birthday messages, and high fives on social.
The idea
Sean Carpenter, a real estate agent and trainer with more than 20 years in the business, shared his daily routine in my book. He calls it the 4H Club. It takes him about 45 minutes, first thing at the office, and the logic is simple: even if the rest of the day goes sideways, he has already done something for his relationships. A note stuck on his monitor is the cue, and an iced coffee afterward is the reward.
How to do it
Handwritten notes. Write five, to people in your sphere, anyone you owe thanks, or the next person on your list you haven't talked to lately. If you have nothing to say, attach something useful (Sean uses a local market report) with a one-line hello. Address them by hand.
Hot sheet. Scan what's new in your market, and for each new listing or change ask who you know within two or three blocks of it. Call, text or email them the listing.
Happy birthdays. Check whose birthday it is and write a couple of paragraphs of wishes, so it stands out from the rest. For closer friends, send a video.
High fives. Five likes and five comments on each social platform you use, plus five random "hope your week is going well" texts.
Example
Sean is upfront that five is arbitrary. Five works for him because it isn't too many, and the point is doing more than one of each, every day.
The Hour of Power: Block a recurring hour, label it HOUR OF POWER, ignore email and calls, and spend it working on your relationships instead of in your inbox.
The Association Hack: Attach five minutes of relationship work to something you already do every day, like your first coffee, so the old habit triggers the new one.
The Happy Almost-Birthday: If you're someone who likes celebrating birthdays, send your wishes the day before, when you aren't one of 200 messages.
Reward Yourself: Relationship work pays off months or years later, so give yourself a small immediate reward right after you do it.