Some friction is the point. Driving across town or naming a dinner night says you care enough to invest, so sometimes choose the less efficient option.
The idea
We've gotten very good at removing friction, and relationships are no exception: a colleague 20 minutes away gets a Calendly link and a 30-minute Zoom between two other calls. But some friction is the point. Driving across town, making a dinner reservation or cleaning the house for six guests all say: I care enough to invest in this. And investment changes relationships.
How to do it
Pick one relationship this week.
Choose the less efficient option on purpose.
Don't Zoom. Meet them.
Don't comment. Call them.
Don't say "we should grab dinner sometime." Name the night.
Example
A client and I were talking about getting together, and they asked if I'd be willing to meet 15 minutes away. I could tell they expected a no, as if my day were too stacked.
Script
"I'm free Thursday night. Want to actually grab dinner?"