Schools and firms don't teach relationship building, so learning it yourself and actually doing it becomes a real competitive advantage.
The idea
Relationship building is one of the most valuable skills in any career, and almost nobody teaches it. Schools are designed for facts and formulas; managing relationships over decades never makes the syllabus. Only 35% of schools have a plan for teaching social and emotional skills, even though 97% of principals believe it would help. What good relationship builders know was passed down one person at a time or learned over years. Your MBA program isn't adding a course and your employer isn't sending you to boot camp. This is on you. The upside: most people won't do the consistent work, so taking a structured approach can be one of your strongest competitive advantages.
How to do it
Accept that you already know the basics: be decent, follow up, notice who matters to you.
Decide it matters enough to work on, then do it consistently and with intention.
Start this week. "No exam, no grades - just text one person you've been 'meaning to catch up with.' That's the whole assignment."
Example
A rainmaker partner at a major law firm once signed up for Relatable on his own dime. He asked me why nobody teaches this in law school, then offered a conspiracy theory: senior people at firms don't want it taught, because they need worker bees to do the work they bring in, not competitors landing their own clients. I laughed. But even if that's not true, it raises a real question.
Most People Won't: Fear keeps most people from reaching out at all, so simply doing it puts you ahead. Their fear is your competitive advantage.
Consistency Over Intensity: Relationship building isn't hard; doing it steadily for years is. Small actions repeated often beat occasional big efforts every time.
The CAPITAL Strategy: Seven linked steps for building relationship capital: C (Consistent execution), A (Aggregate), P (Prioritize), I (Investigate), T (Timely engagement), A (Add value), L (Leverage).
Time and Fear, the Two Universal Blockers: Almost every reason people don't stay in touch comes down to two things: not having time, or fear of how the outreach will land.