Diagnose your season (planting, nurturing, harvesting or hibernating), match your effort to it, and give yourself permission to say no when it's winter.
The idea
Just as you wouldn't break out the swimsuit in January, some networking approaches don't fit where you are in life. Your network moves through four seasons depending on your focus, capacity and season of life: spring (planting: a new industry, company, city or role), summer (nurturing existing relationships), fall (harvesting: referrals and collaborations come to you) and winter (selective hibernation: heads down, only your closest people).
How to do it
Identify your current season. Be honest about it.
Align your strategy to it. Don't try to plant new seeds in winter.
Give yourself permission to say no to new connections when you're nurturing or hibernating.
Remember that seasons change. What works now might not work in six months.
Example
In 2022 I dove into a completely new industry and had to build a network from scratch, the awkward new kid at lunch. In January 2026 I was in winter: saying no to most new connections while focusing on existing relationships and specific projects.
Watch out for
Hibernation is selective. It still means focusing on your closest connections.
Depth by Default: The people you already know already trust you, so deepen first; expand only for a specific reason, and follow up with two known people for every new one.
Start With Why - Set Your Relationship Goals: Before building any system, decide what you want from your relationships and why. Opportunities, retention, referrals, a brand, or simply feeling good.
Your Network Is Your North Star: The people around you expand or shrink what you believe is possible, at work and at home, so choose them on purpose and keep a small growth circle close.